Stacey Banfield

Christchurch Based Makeup Artist & Blogger

Dear Social World

Lately in the online community there’s been a real shift in mood. It seems like the social pressures are getting to everyone and no one really knows how to tackle the issue, so here I am speaking out because I truly think so many people need to read this. Instagram has become more of a comparison game these days of things like, who has the most followers, how many likes you can get on your photos or who can get the best brand deal.

It saddens me that this is what its all coming down to. For me I’ve always been about trying to remain my true self no matter what, and I admit it can be bloody hard. You see so many stunning young girls popping up all over the show getting thousands of likes just because of the way they look, or who they might be friends with. I know this has been a huge topic for many lately, about how even in NZ literally every new account you come across is claiming they are an “Influencer”.

Meanwhile you might be spending 60hours a week, slaving your ass off for years to create awesome and different content that barely these days pushes 400 likes (insert me here ).But do you know what, at the end of the day none of the materialistic shit actually matters. Your followers don’t care if your prettier than someone else, they don’t care about what kind of car you drive, they care about your content and your overall message that your sharing with them and the relationship they have formed with your account.

The key focus shouldnt be about how good you can “make” yourself or your life look, but more about finding your purpose, remaining authentic, showing your high’s and lows and just taking your followers on the journey of your normal everyday life. Why? because for most people this is what adds value to their life! and for me this is a HUGE part of why I do what I do!! People want to know you are just like them, they want to feel like they can achieve what you have and not be made to feel shit about why they can’t afford a LV bag at the age of 25.

At the end of the day, unless your Kim K you are not a celebrity, you are just like everyone else on this earth, so please sit down and remain humble!

Trust me it happens to me too, I often find myself feeling shit that I can’t travel overseas every damn weekend, but the thing is I have responsibilities which alot of these big accounts online probably don’t have. I own a home and I run my own business, that is the reality and to be honest I’ve worked so bloody hard for those things over the years. I want this part of my life to be about enjoying the real sucesses i’ve had, and the chance to be able to put myself in the position to set myself up for the long run.

Because guess what, there is more to life than Instagram. Yes it is an amazing platform and I am so grateful for it as it connects us all to new friends, opportunities and gives us the chance to share our creative talents and journey’s but one day it will be gone, and that’s just the way it is. No one will remember you as the girl who had 500 LV bags, ate breakfast at flash places everyday and drove a Mercedes G Wagon, but they will remember key values you helped install into them. They will remember your story, how you overcame your struggles and they will remember you for being honest and authentic.

Life shouldn’t be a competition for anyone! Please stop putting such huge amounts of stress on your mind, it won’t do your soul any good. It will ruin relationships, knock your confidence, make you question every single thing you do and it will consume you –  trust me i’ve been there myself! You literally don’t need the social validation you are seeking at all!! If you focus more on what good you can do for others, and not the “fame” of what being online could bring you, then you will see life so differently.


Gaining interest from your following

The lengths we all go to ensure our following remain interested is pretty intense, but please don’t be tempted by those “Buy In” Giveaways where you pay to be apart of a loop, or where it requires you to spend thousands of your hard earned money on creating an insanely massive giveaway full of things you can’t even afford to own yourself.If anything your setting yourself up with more stress, because then the expectation is there that every giveaway you do after that will be just as good. Then there’s also the point that yes you may gain followers, but once the giveaway is announced you will also continue to loose some daily – so really is it worth all that money and stress in the end?

I guess what it all comes down to is being real, remember the people who follow you come from all walks of life. Stay true to yourself and let your content do the talking. Who cares if someone gets more like than you, it doesn’t determine anything or make them any better than you. As the girls over at Ace The Gram said earlier today building 1000 true fans will win everytime over having 10k followers who don’t give a shit. They may tell you that you look pretty or love your outfit but ultimately, you shouldn’t be posting just to get compliments.

So I hope this in someway makes you feel a little better, get out of that rutt and continue doing what you do best. Stay original, the markets already so saturated there’s no need for you to try be like everyone else. Post things that are relative to you and your life and remember that no one grows insanely overnight. Instagram isn’t like it use to be a few years ago, we reach barely any new accounts but we are all in the same position, so remember you are not alone.

And to any followers who are reading this, I hope you follow accounts that give you warm fuzzies, add value to your life, make you feel like you are their friend and keep you excited for their next post. You may only have a handful of accounts like this that you follow, so make sure you support them! Like their posts, send them DM’s because at the end of the day you guys are the reason we continue doing what we do and I can’t speak for everyone but I appreciate every single one of you.


Stacey x



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